Same old brand new you

So, if you’ve been on my Instagram and seen the 20 million pictures I post of Sienna, you’ll know that round about four months ago, I gave birth to the most beautiful girl in the world (not bias at all 🙄)

If you’ve also read any of my blogs recently, you’ll know that my life has changed a fair bit since I started my journey as a new mum. One of the first big changes that happened to me was when I was 20 weeks pregnant and I had to stop running.

Up until then I’d still been going on at least six runs a week pretty comfortably. Unfortunately though, at five months pregnant I got sciatica and running was too painful so I had to quit. At the time I was devastated but looking back I’m so happy my body forced me to stop. This is because, again if you have been on my Instagram you’ll know, I have a tendency to fall over on my runs and if this had happened when I was pregnant, I would never have forgiven myself.

Luckily, I replaced running with a lot of walking ( so much walking that Stu thought I was turning into a Labrador)and I soon didn’t miss my runs. Running went even further to the back of my mind when Sienna was born and walking round the block felt like a work out.

That was until a couple of weeks ago when I bumped into a friend who had a baby in January (just a month before Sienna) and she told me she was training for the Great South Run. When she told me this I partly thought she was amazing, partly thought she was crazy and partly thought, I wish I could do that.

I soon brushed those thoughts aside when I got home, fed Sienna and got back to my new mum routine…or so I thought. The following Saturday I woke up at Sienna a clock, fed her and suddenly had the urge to go for a run. Stu, being sensible Stu and well aware of accidental Ali’s history, told me to go but to be very careful and to take it slow.

Not listening as usual, I sprinted out the door like a puppy let off the lead or dad heading to the pub and by the time I got to the end of the road I was so tired I wondered if I could make it round the block let alone my usual running route.

Thankfully, as I turned the corner and I settled into a more realistic pace, I began to really enjoy the run. Listening to my cool music (Dolly Parton and Abba) I felt like my old self again and after 20 minutes of pure escapism, I came home buzzing with endorphins.

This high got even higher when Stu opened the door with a cold pint of water and my beautiful Sienna, complete with banners she had made / tried to eat after Stu had written them.

After enjoying a taste of my old life, my mum life soon came calling when Sienna needed another feed. As I sat feeding her the reality of not running for over eight months hit my body and suddenly everything ached.

By the end of the day I felt shattered – even more shattered than you do at end of every day as a mum. However, the next day, thanks to my addictive personality, I wanted another endorphin high and while the run felt amazing again, when I got home the aches were even worse.

You’d, think after this I would have realised maybe after all this time of not running my body maybe needed a little time to rest and catch up…you’d think this but on the Monday, when Stu got home from work I decided to go for another run.

Running down the road, I honestly felt like my trainers were made of led and my poor knees were more wobbly than a bowl of jelly. Despite the pain, I did make it round my run and I did still feel on a high. But while I was happy to be running again, I was a bit sad my body didn’t feel the way it used to after my runs.

This sadness luckily soon disappeared when I had a cuddle with Sienna. It was amazing that the “old me” could run for miles without feeling tired, it’s more amazing that the “new

me” carried and grew the most beautiful girl in the world (again not bias at all!)

I really want to keep on running to keep that old taste of my life but I’m also not going to beat myself up if I can’t go as far or need to rest more because I’m not that girl anymore, I’m a much stronger brand new woman.

2 thoughts on “Same old brand new you

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